White Elephant Gift Exchange
by Mitchell Movie Productions
Summary: Every year, the kids has a White Elephant Gift Exchange, and every year, Luan screws everyone else over with prank gifts, so the kids decide to give Luan the gift of revenge.
1. Chapter 1

Our story begins in Toon City just before Christmastime. The town was blanketed with snow, the trees were being trimmed, and everyone was making up their Christmas lists.

At Sora's house, everyone was in the fancy living room, watching TV.

"Jake, You're not wearing the sweater I made you." Leni walked in, noticing Jake Long in his casual wear.

"Uh... Well, it's a little warm in here." Jake then said.

"Don we now our gay apparel." Leni said, annoyed. Sighing, Jake puts on his sweater, which is basically similar to the Christmas sweaters that Mabel makes.

"Doesn't get much gayer than this." Jake muttered.

"Sora, tomorrow's Christmas Eve, and you still haven't gotten a tree. " Leni said, concerned.

"I told you, Danny, Jake and I are on dipsaluscious vacation. What part of that don't you understand?" The Keyblade holder said, bored.

"Guys, it's literally the only thing I've asked you to do. Please?" Lori then said.

"Jake, tape this for me." Danny groaned.

"Sorry, dawg. The DVR hasn't worked since you tried to tape Thursday Night Football." Jake then said.

Cutaway Gag

Danny is setting his DVR for the Bears/Packers Thursday Night game, that is until the Justice League bursts through the door in a furious manner.

"Do you have the express written consent of CBS and the National Football League?" Batman demanded as he raised a batarang.

"Just CBS." Danny nervously said as Batman threw the batarang at the DVR, exploding it to bits.

End of Cutaway

"If you get us a tree, I'll make sure Santa brings you a new DVR. Please?" Luna pleaded

"Crap. How come I have...? Commercial!" Danny said as he lightened up, then he went outside and cut down a tree and rushed right inside.

"Here's your tree! Merry Christmas to all and to all shut the hell up." Danny said, hurriedly as he placed the tree in the tree holder.

He was about to sit, until Luna interrupts by saying, "Ah ah ah ah, before you sit down, we're due at Luke's for eggnog."

Danny groans as he said, "Can't we tell them your mother died, Luna?"

"I won't lie about something like that, Danny." Luna said, getting her winter gear on.

"God, when did Christmas become so complicated?" Danny muttered, annoyed.

Meanwhile at Sherman Peabody's bedroom, all the kids were gathered and had concerned looks on their faces.

"Alright, everybody! It's the holiday season so we've got a lot of things on the agenda. We've got to hang the lights on the tree, prep the field for the annual Christmas Bowl. And last, but not least, tomorrow night is our yearly white elephant gift exchange." Sherman said, making everyone groan.

"Sherman, you've gotta call off the white elephant!" Gerald begged.

"Yeah, you know Luan always pranks us by getting us terrible gifts!" Johnny test then said.

"Every year, her gifts ruin Christmas!" Jimmy Neutron groaned.

"Yeah, I love my sister, but she doesn't know when to quit!" Lincoln sighed.

"You remember the glove incident, don't you?" Dee Dee asks.

"Don't remind me." Dexter said, cringing.

"Criminy, and I thought it was humiliating enough when Sherman laughed at Penny and Pacifica and Mabel fighting over a dress at the mall." Helga sighed.

Penny glares at Sherman as she snapped, "Sherman, how could you? You think that getting punched is funny? It's not!"

"I'll admit it's not funny that you got hit, It's kinda ridiculous that you and Pacifica fought over a pair of clothes!" Sherman said, nervously.

Penny glares at Sherman and punches him in the face.

"FINLAND!" Sherman said, dazed before coming to his senses.

"Every time you think you're gonna get something you want then, BAM!" Helga said, annoyed. "Luan swoops in, steals your good gift, and you're stuck with her prank one!"

"But this year's gonna be different, this year, we're gonna give her the horrible gifts!" Jimmy then said.

"But there's no way of knowing if she'll pick the right gift!" Libby said.

"It's impossible to rig it!" Sherman said.

"It's not impossible if the odds are stacked in your favor!" Jimmy said.

"What do you mean?" Lincoln asks.

"I mean I've got a plan!" Jimmy said, drawing his diagram on a whiteboard. "The order of the white elephant gift exchange is decided by picking random numbers out of a hat! But what if it wasn't random? What if we write the exact same number on every piece of paper and pretend to have our numbers called! Yes, what could it be? What's something Luan and Lane wouldn't want to steal? Something even Lane would find absolutely horrible!"

"Mr. Coconuts decapitated?" Lucy asks.

"A pie in the face?" Gerald asks.

"No! It's a known fact that Luan and Lane hate anything school related!" Jimmy then said. "Keep doing this, gift after gift! Nothing but school accessories until Luan is the only one in the game who hasn't stolen anything. Leaving no choice but for her but to pick the last remaining gift we set up for her. And that's where you guys come in, I already bought the school stuff. We just need to find the worst possible gift for Luan."


	2. Chapter 2

At Luke's room, it wasn't much different from Luna's room. Danny sat there, looking bored as Luke and the boys were hanging out.

"You guys know that Rudolph is on, right?" Danny then said.

"Danny!" Luna said, whispering. Surely enough, Luke Loud is drinking a flask of eggnog.

"How much can one 15 year old drink without being caught?!" Danny asks, shocked.

"WHOOO!" Luke whooped.

"Luke, get some coffee." Danny said, annoyed.

"Trust me, that's literally his 4th Eggnog." Loki then said. "He's always like this on Christmastime."

"Oh, man." Danny groaned. "Please tell me that I won't put up with this behavior."

Suddenly, his prayers are answered as he heard Sora, Jake, Terrence and Trent sing, "Check the balls on Uncle Charlie..."

"Alright!" Danny then said, anxious. "Time for a-wasslin!"

"Hey, can the boys go with you?" Luna asks.

"That'll be about as much fun as a lecture on ontological empiricism." Danny sarcastically said.

"Sweetie," Luna said, giving Danny a puppy eyed look while rubbing Danny's mid-section like rubbing Charles' belly. "The dudes just want to have fun! For me? Please?"

Danny sighs as he said, "Alright, alright. But you _owe_ me. Later, in Dexter's Lab, underneath the mistletoe. No matter how drunk I am!"

"Remember, the gifts are hidden in the trunk. Don't forget to drop off the one for Toys for Toddlers." Luna smiled.

Later, Danny is out with his buddies, about to have a night out in the town.

"Someone give me a beer," Danny then said. Jake tossed him a beer, but surely enough, Loki grabbed the beer.

"Danny, one of us has to be the designated driver. And the boys and I already had five eggnogs. So I guess you're it." Loki said.

"Yeah, real good one." Danny said, taking back the beer before Loni smacks him and takes the beer.

"Don't think we'll send you to jail!" Loni shouted.

"Let's rock!" Luke said as the kids ran into the town.

At Jewel-Osco, Cindy, Pacifica, Phoebe, Libby, and Betty were looking for something. Luan has to pay for her holiday pranks.

"Hahahaha! What about this? Can't get any worse than expired tuna!" Cindy said, grabbing a can of Tuna.

"Isn't that much?" Pacifica said.

"No way! Remember what she did to you at last year's white elephant!?" Libby then said.

Pacifica ponders in thought.

Flashback:

 _Pacifica pouts as Luan steals away Mrs. Coconuts._

 _"Finally! Now I have Mrs. Coconuts! Now Mr. and Mrs. Coconuts could make a tree!" Luan laughs. "But don't worry, Pacifica. I got something for you!"_

 _She opens the gift, which is revealed to be a black liquid in a bottle. S_ _he pulls the bottle top off and sniffs it, and retches in disgust._

 _"What the hell is this?!" Pacifica yelped._

 _"It used to be ranch dressing 20 years ago, but now, BOOM! Brand new paperweight!" Luan laughs as he sees a miserable Pacifica sobbing over paperweight._

Flashback over.

Pacifica scowls. She'd never thought Luan would stoop that low.

"You!" Pacifica asks, asking for the employee. "What's the worst expired food item you've got?!"

"Aisle 6." The employee said.

Meanwhile, a group of drunk Teenagers lead by a sober halfa were having the time of their lives.

Danny on the other hand, was irritated, he has to put up with a bunch of a drunk friends, and he was the only sober person, and he wasn't taking it well.

Loki was staggering and stuttering into a trash can, making the others laugh.

"That's as funny as _A Million Ways to Die in the Old West_." Danny mumbled, sarcastically. "Now, come on, I gotta go to friggin' Toys for Toddlers."

"Looks like someone's got a _humbug_ up his butt!" Lane joked as he was about to lose balance.

"Time for a lemon snowcone!" Luke then said.

"Those don't taste like lemons, they taste like..." Danny said, eyes widening. "...Oh, you sons of bitches..."

The drunk boys stumble their way out as Danny growls in anger.

The fallowing morning, Danielle noticed Danny sitting on the couch, not hungover, and looking for something to watch on TV.

"So, how t'was your Night Before Christmas?" Danielle chuckled.

"I don't have a hangover thanks to Luke Loud and his brothers and a drunk Keyblade holder. At least I donated all the gifts." Danny then said.

"All?" Danielle said, surprised. "Uh, Danny, didn't Luna told you that all those gifts were for the Loud Family?"

"No, the card said "From"!" Danny said skeptically. Then he looked concerned as he said, "Weren't they? Ah, shit. Since when did they change the meaning of "for" to "from"?"

"They had a meeting about it last night." Danielle said, bored. "They sent you a card, but it said "for Peter", so you must've thought it was from you, so you didn't, uh... You know what, It's just easier to call you stupid."

At the park, Dexter was making a deal with Wolfgang.

"How much?" Dexter then said.

"$500 for the day." Wolfgang said, shrugging.

Jimmy puts a hand on Dexter's shoulder as he asks, "Dexter, do you really wanna go through with this?"

 ** _Flashback:_**

 _The kids are all together in the living room as Dexter_ _is wearing white gloves he received from Luan._

 _"Wow! These gloves are great!" Dexter said, happily._

 _"Do you think so?" Luan said, snickering._

 _Dexter feels them on his face as he said, "_ _Yeah, they're so soft!_ _Why?"_

 _"Because they're made of my Brother's old underwear!" Luan chuckled as she bursted into laughter._

 _Dexter immediately takes his hands off his face and sees the palms of the gloves have the oulines of Lincolns underwear. He panics and tries to shake them off to no avail._

 _"Noooooooooooo!" Dexter cried._

 ** _End of Flashback:_**

A stern look emerges on Dexter as he said, "I'm not ready to retire the lab at 68 anyway!"

"Pleasure doing business with ya." Wolfgang said as he takes the 500 bucks.

 ** _At the Loud House_**

"You donated all the presents?!" Luna shouted, angrily.

"Luna," Danny said, charging his blasts in his fists. "If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine."

"You brought glad tidings to a family less fortunate than your own, dude. Tis the season to be jolly, bro!" Luna said.

"You're not mad?" Danny said, reverting to human form.

"I am a bit pissed that I have to shop again. But at least some good came out of it."

"So I can drink root beer and watch TV?"

Luna grinned as she said, "You can watch all the TV you want...just as soon as we get back from the mall."

Danny groaned, "The mall? On Christmas Eve? You're joking!"

"Dude, I just want this family to have a perfect Christmas." Luna said. "And Lincoln's busy with his _final project_."

Danny looks curious about what she meant by "Final Project".

 **at the Mall-**

Danny and the Louds were just finishing up shopping when suddenly at Dick's Sporting goods, Danny saw Danielle and Mabel shopping for a gift. The girls are staring at a baseball launcher machine.

"We gotta get this!" Mabel said, happily.

"I don't know. I mean, I wanna kick Luan around, but she doesn't deserve it. Don't you think this is too harsh?" Danielle shrugged, unsure.

"Oh, so Luan's gifts were never too harsh?" Mabel then said. Danielle pondered to herself about what happened a year ago.

 ** _Flashback:_**

 _Mabel and Danielle are rolling around, scratching and yelling while wearing red sweaters as Luan is laughing like crazy._

 _"Itching powder in the sweater! A classic good ol' rash-ioned prank!" Luan laughs._

 _"Aaaah! It's in my eye!" Dani cried._

 ** _End flashback._**

"You're right. It's not harsh at all. Let's buy it." Danielle said, sternly as Mabel chuckled. Danny walked over to the commotion and saw what was going on.

"What are you girls doing?" Danny asks.

"Getting ready for Baseball?!" Danielle and Mabel nervously lied.

"Alright..." Danny said, narrowing his eyes.


	3. Chapter 3

That night on Christmas eve, all the kids were all gathered as the Teens were settling down for a holiday White Elephant Gift Exchange party. The Teenagers got the drinks set and the food set. As the kids were getting all their white elephant prank ready.

"Well, which one should we give her?" Jimmy asks.

"I dunno, which one's worse?" Gerald asks.

"All of them. ALL OF THEM! Put all of them together, NOW!" Dexter demanded angrily.

The kids the gifts together is shown with Dexter laughing over it as the kids laugh, catching Danny's attention as he angrily stomps over..

"You about to ruin the spirit of the white elephant gift exchange?!" Danny shouts.

"Danny, Luan's the one pranking us and all you ever to is defend her because she's your girlfriend's sister!" Danielle shouted.

"Oh, I do not!" Danny scoffs.

"Please! You always do it!" Danielle laughs.

"Remember when she nearly gave up on Comedy?!" Danny shouted. "Lincoln made sure that she stayed on the path to comedy before any more damage could be done by managing to get her to do her gig at the comedy club!"

Helga states, "Look, I know we went a little overboard with the prank gift for Luan! But didn't you see the gifts she gave us? The ranch dressing, the sweaters, the underwear gloves, I could go on!"

"Please don't." Dexter sighed.

"Sure, she goes overboard with her April Fools pranks and any prank, but you're not supposed to get gifts you like! You're supposed to give gifts you don't like! That's what makes it fun! Except you had to go and rig the game and get revenge! Well, I hope you're going to be happy with yourselves!" Danny then said, annoyed.

"God Damn, dude." Luna said, shocked.

"Well, it's just that..." Danny then said.

Then there is a knock on the door, it's Luan! Helga opens the door and lets her in as she brings in a big gift.

"This is a huge load! I guess Luke should've brought Toilet Paper." Luan joked as Lane laughed.

"Good one, Sweetie!" Lane then said.

As the hours went by, and when the Loud teen boys had their drinks, everyone fakes their number, picks up a school accessory and Luan and Lane laughs at them.

"Sheesh, what's with the studying equipment?" Lane asks.

"Yeah, Finals were last week? Or did you cheat?" Luan laughs.

"Alright everybody, we're down to the last two gifts! I wonder what they could be!? Next up is number 6!" Luna said.

"OOOHHH! Lucky number six!" Dipper exclaimed.

"Dipstick! Come on up and pick your gift!" Helga said.

Dipper picks Luan's gift as he opens it. Everyone gasps as it reveals to be a new HD TV with surrounding sound.

"Huh? A new TV!" Dipper said.

"This had better be a joke." Helga said.

"It's not a joke!" Lincoln said.

"Is this for real, Luan?" Gerald asks.

Luan sighed, "No! It's not a prank! It's an honest to goodness flat screen TV! Look, I know I may have not been the best White Elephant participant in the last few years! Some of you may even have called my pranks harsh or out of line and I thought this gift would bring us closer together! 'cause you guys are like my family! That's what the holidays are about! Family! Anyways, since there's nothing good left to steal, I guess I'll just take this one."

Danny sighed as he said, "Sorry I've been such a buzzkill recently, I just wanted to relax for the first time in many christmases."

"Yeah, I've noticed. Tucker told me everything." Luna said.

"Yeah..." Danny cringed. "Luan, wait..."

"What?" Luan asks.

"Well, the kids..." Danny replied, glaring at the kids.

Later that night, the kids' parents were angrily arriving. They've must've heard everything.

"Well, I must say, this is a new low for you Lincoln." Rita said.

"Danielle! I thought you were smarter than this!" Jack snapped. "Danny was more responsible than you tonight, missy!"

"But..." The kids said.

"Ah ah ah.. I don't wanna hear it. Anything you'd like to say to..." Lynn Sr. said.

"Guys! Wait!" Helga shouted as she held Chinese food in her hands from the box. "It's just a box full of old food, not a New TV!"

"WHA?!" Everyone exclaimed as Luan bursted into laughter.

"Gotcha! Heartfelt speech gets them every year!" Luan laughed. "So what were you gonna say to me, guys?"

Danny looked at everyone as they furiously nodded.

"Enjoy the gift!" Danny chuckled darkly.

Luan shrugged as she opened the gift.

Luan opens up her gift, and the first thing that bursts out is a can of expired clam chowder, which is what the girls got at the 99¢ store. It pops open at it splatters clam chowder all over a shocked Luan, while the others laugh at her misfortune. After slipping, Luan rips off some more wrapping paper from her gift, and the second thing to come out is a baseball pitching machine, which is what Danielle and Mabel got at the camping store. The machine shoots out the "paperweight", Danielle and Mabel's itching powder covered sweaters, Dexter's underwear gloves, and many baseballs at Luan. The others continue to laugh at her pain while Sheen records the whole thing with a video camera. After getting up on her feet, Luan rips off some more of the wrapping paper, and the last thing to come out is Wolfgang, which is the person Jimmy and Dexter gave the $500 to. He jumps out of the present, and begins to mercilessly beat up Luan while the others enjoy themselves by drinking grape soda.

"Kharma's a bitch." Danny then said, prompting everyone to laugh.

 **Happy Holidays**


End file.
